> I was standing at the bar at the Legion Hall one night minding my own business.
>> This FAT ugly chick came up behind me, grabbed my behind and said, "You're kinda cute. You gotta phone number?"
>>
>> I said, "Yeah, you gotta pen?"
>>
>> She said, "Yeah, I got a pen".
>>
>> I said, "You better get back in it before the farmer misses you."
>>
>> Cost me 6 stitches...but,
>>
>> When you’re 70 ...............who cares?
>>
>>
>>
>> I went to the CVS drug store and told the clerk "Give me 3 packets of condoms, please."
>>
>> Lady Clerk: "Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?”
>>
>> I said "Nah... She's purty good lookin'....."
>>
>> When you’re 70..............who cares?
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> I was talking to a young woman in the Polish Club last night.
>>
>> She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right.”
>>
>> I said, “If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you.”
>>
>> Cost me a fat lip, but...
>>
>> When you’re 68 ....who cares?
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> I was telling a woman in the Lion’s Club about my ability to guess what day a woman was born just by feeling her breasts.
>>
>> "Really" she said, "Go on then... try."
>>
>> After about thirty seconds of fondling she began to lose patience and said, "Come on, what day was I born?"
>>
>> I said, "Yesterday."
>>
>> Cost me a kick in the
, but...
>>
>> When you’re 70...............who cares?
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> I got caught taking a pee in the swimming pool today.
>>
>> The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in.
>>
>> When you’re 70...............who cares?
>>
>>
>>
>>
>> I went to our Farmers Club last night and saw a BIG woman dancing on a table.
>>
>> I said, "Good legs."
>>
>> The girl giggled and said, "Do you really think so?"
>>
>> I said, "Definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now."
>>
>> Cost me 6 more stitches, but...
>>
>> When you’re 70...............who cares?
>>
>>
