1. A man got a call from his doctor who said "I have some bad news and some terrible news, which would you rather hear first?"
The man says "The bad news"
The doctor says "The lab messed up your tests and when they redid them, they found out you only have 48 hours to live!"
The man exclaimed , "What could be more terrible than that!?"
The doctor replied "we tried calling you yesterday to get hold of you but your cell phone was busy!"
2. Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a negligee. The only problem was she was coming home.
3.JOB OPENING
I would like to fill your sales position. I have references.. I was the best Door to Door security alarm salesman for over 25 years running
The trick was to just leave a brochure on the kitchen table if there was nobody home,
