No, but she shouldn't be able to kill it either. Adoption exist for a reason. My wife and I will be looking to adopt in the next couple years. You find someone that's suffered a rape and doesn't want the baby you be sure to tell them there are people out there who will love the child and take care of it as their own. As far as your girl, she said what she said and I understand it all to well. I just see it as extremely hypocritical the way you all jumped all over Grudgie for eugenics; then for her to say that? That's fucked up. I don't care who are. Abortion isn't natural and we aren't fruit. My own mother had an abortion over this same issue because of testing done during early pregnancy. A decision she regrets to this day. And you want to know the really messed up part of it? Children aren't supposed to have memories prior to being one and a half. My first memory is the place she got her abortion when I was six months old. I can recall the interior, the receptionist, the room she went in, and where I sat. It freaks her out to this day that I knew her dirty little secret before she ever confessed. So he may have only been a couple months old, but that shit was wrong enough to stick with me. Life begins at conception. End of story.
I'm sorry you and your wife had such tragedy befall you, but it warms my heart to hear that there will be some lucky kiddo in the near future that will get to be in such a loving, good home.
I've never been pregnant, don't know if I can be, but I know many people that have had abortions, which I truly believe was the right decision for them. I've also known many that kept their child but shouldn't have (I'm thinking more of giving them up for adoption when I say that). Personally, I don't know what choice I would have made if I'd gotten pregnant as a teen, and because of that, I feel like it would be wrong of me to condemn folks for choices they made or deny them that choice, having never gone through that myself. TG and I discussed it early on in our relationship, that if we ever have an oops situation, we'd be happy and blessed to raise a child.
When children are brought into the world, there is always the possibility that something happens to the parents before the children are old enough to take care of themselves. Children with Down Syndrome will never be able to be on their own, which extends the length of time in which tragedy can strike. It may be that the parents of the child have the resources, the love, the time, the patience to devote to a disabled child, but will the legal guardians be able to fill those shoes if something happens?
You can't live your life restricted by the ifs and buts, but when you bring children into the world, there should be a lot of plan Bs and Cs in place because those kids depend on you. I don't plan to have kids until I'm done or nearly done with my PhD because, God forbid, if something happens (TG falls off the barn roof or leaves me for a younger, nicer girl) I will be the sole provider for my them and am gearing up for that task. I am well aware of my weaknesses and do not think I would bring a severely disabled child into this world if I had the choice, I'm not strong enough for that. With that said, if I did not have a choice, I would do the best I could with what I had.
New Mexico has the highest rate of teen pregnancy in the nation (all those condoms catching on abstinence rings and tearing). We also have a lot of horrific child abuse cases here. I think like most political issues, I may feel a different way about the subject if some other aspects of our system changed first. I'll illustrate this point with a story:
I was riding the train into the city one day, quietly listening to a group of folks that were in the same train car. There were several gang banger looking dudes in their 30's, a teenage girl about 16, and a woman breastfeeding a baby. It was a weekday (the teen was skipping school) and the whole group was headed to the methadone clinic. Have you ever heard a drug addict's baby cry? It's a raspy cry that sounds like the baby's been smoking cigarettes and drinking jack. I think it's because they strain their vocal cords from crying so much while mom's nodding off. They were all talking about how they needed to score some more pills of some sort that really turn on the methadone. The woman breastfeeding the baby said she spent the day before fucked up on her friends couch all day on this drug concoction (who was watching the baby?). I felt sick to my stomach the entire trip.
I talked to a friend about this that knows the system and was told that the state leaves babies in the care of their mothers knowing mom and baby are both hooked on methadone, so they can periodically check the health of the baby. If it became common practice to remove children from these situations, the moms would not take the children with them to the clinic or they would stop going themselves and go back to the smack. Pretty fucked up, huh?
Maybe I'm a terrible person for thinking that some babies are better off not being born than being raised by drug addicts, physical and sexual abusers, etc..., but I don't feel like I am and I'm pretty sure the good book says that's for your boss to decide, not you.
I'm a pretty abrasive person with strong opinions on most everything. I rarely hold anything back to spare feelings, because I consider honesty to be a greater virtue. I also don't expect others to hold back-- I wouldn't dish it out if I couldn't take it. The point of discussions is to gain new perspective. My perspective is from an ecological standpoint, while your's is spiritually based.
This is merely an observation, not an attack, but the difference lies in how we classify humans. To me, we are more complex than most animals, but animals nonetheless. Christianity identifies humans as made in God's likeness, unique and superior to all other life on the planet, with additional rules and responsibilities beyond just survival and procreation. While I implore people to hold themselves to higher standards than they would their pet dog or turtle, I don't know where man gets off thinking that he is above the laws of nature. At least a fruit tree has the good sense to limit the number of embryos it produces to the number that it can appropriately provide for.
I simply stated my view, perhaps nothing I say is as refined or graceful as it could be, but my words don't invalidate the views of others or stand in the way of your life, your values, your decisions. While I am not a proponent of eugenics, I didn't "jump on" Grudgie for being one. I guarantee I'm a hypocrite in many regards, but I try hard not to be. My natural inclination is to be judgmental of everyone and everything, but the more I live, the more mistakes I make, and the more forgiving and tolerant I become of others choices, actions, mistakes. I may not end up in the same place as some of you in the afterlife, but in the present, I'm following my moral compass and resting easy at night thinking that I'm a pretty okay person.