Author Topic: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?  (Read 2731 times)

Offline JohnyMac

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #25 on: April 10, 2013, 06:21:58 PM »
O'hhh Crystal, what does your mom know  ;)

My number want need in a women is humor.
My number two need in a women is smarts.
My number three, four and maybe five is physical attributes.
My remaining needs are interest in my and her hobbies.




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Alex1992

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #26 on: April 10, 2013, 07:02:06 PM »
I haven't been dating a lot too Crystal, I haven't dated since I was 16 (I'm 20) but I haven't thought about it now thanks to this thread same goes to my first GF.

Offline thatGirl

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #27 on: April 10, 2013, 08:17:23 PM »
@ CrystalHunter

BTW, according to some of my single lady friends, the algorithm you describe applies to men as well :)) 

You are currently working courageously hard to improve your health/fitness, which will also improve your self-confidence.  You are an intelligent man with a great sense of humor and a captivating writing style who is pursuing higher education-- as soon as that confidence kicks in, the fish will start biting. 

If I remember correctly, I want to say you're mid 20's???  Anywhere in the range of mid 20's to early 40's, some percentage of those women that are currently attached according to your algorithm, will become unattached as they realize that adult them has nothing in common with the boyfriends/husbands that they met in their late teens/early 20's (wipe that hopeful look off your face, TG, this doesn't apply to you ;D).  That's also when chicks actually start wanting a "nice guy" instead of just saying they want a "nice guy" while hopping up and down on the asshole jock. 

You certainly have to put yourself out there and be proactive, but I'm willing to bet you that the over-fished pond you're in is about to be restocked.  Be forewarned though, all women are crazy, just to varying degrees.  Shoot for slightly insecure and occasionally emotional/needy; avoid major daddy issues, compulsive liar, not sure whether she's about to cut your balls off or bake you a cake- manic.

For all of you single guys, especially the youngins (Alex), your number one priority should be yourself.  Focus on your own self-improvement goals, career, fitness, hobbies, etc... and don't get too wrapped up in old or new flames.  If you know yourself and feel good about who are and what you do, you'll attract women that promote that.  I know I've said it before, but you'll find that special someone soon enough, so don't waste too much of your time looking for or pining over women.  Just enjoy fleeting moments with all those not so special someones in the short interim before you meet the one. 
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You have freedom when you're easy in your harness.
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Offline thatGirl

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #28 on: April 10, 2013, 08:21:10 PM »
I figure I'll give my account and TG can give his if he wants, the truth is probably somewhere in the middle...

I used to go to a lot of punk shows when I was 15-17 years old.  There was this hot punk kid (guess who) that was always at the shows, usually shit-faced drunk, spanging change to get in to the show.  My boyfriend at the time and some friends of mine knew TG, so we'd talk at shows and he'd tag along when my buddies would visit me at school.  TG and I were both in long-term relationships with other people throughout high school, and I apparently came across as such a bitch that nothing ever happened between us.

Fast forward to 19 years old.  TG and I run into each other at a coffee shop/music venue.  He had traded in his mohawk for a high and tight, nice fitting levis and cowboy boots.    I was newly single, had spent most of my dating years in shitty relationships and had no desire to jump into another one.  We quickly became best friends and spent the next several months playing an intense game of cat and mouse.  At a toga party, after a night of drinking, we finally hooked up.  A week or so later, TG consoled me over the Devil's loss in game 7 for the Stanley Cup, then gave me an ultimatum.  He wanted a girlfriend, not a bed buddy, and I had a week to agree or cut him loose.  Less than a week later, TG shows up at our coffee shop hangout with another chick.  Needless to say, we had our first fight as a couple that night and the other chick had to find another ride home...

I left out a few details in the story, like TG loaning 505th money to take me on a date before we got together, TG telling me that a buddy of his I'd shown interest in had the clap, which wasn't true, and an open ended threat I made to some of TG's female fan club to kick any chick's ass that made a move on him.  Here we are, nearly 12 years later.  He's not the same asshole I fell in love with, although he is still an asshole, and I only regret little of it :))
All the great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope.
Winston Churchill

You have freedom when you're easy in your harness.
Robert Frost

Tomorrow hopes we have learned something from yesterday.
John Wayne

Offline JohnyMac

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #29 on: April 10, 2013, 08:36:24 PM »
Great story TGrl!

The question we all have but I am old enough to ask is...Was the mohawk red? Earring in left or right ear?
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CrystalHunter1989

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #30 on: April 10, 2013, 09:33:26 PM »
I must have forgotten to carry the 1 in my calculations or I'd have known the algorithm can go both ways (yes, I said it, laugh).

Great story Tgirl. Thanks for the advice and the compliments! It took me awhile to realize that I could have a much for fulfilling young life if I put girls aside for awhile. Not to get too deep on this topic, but I think society puts WAY too much pressure on young people to "get with" someone. The pool is certainly overfished. Locale doesn't help much either. But it's cool, got to spend all that money on books and guns!

Offline mountainredneck2051

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #31 on: April 10, 2013, 10:34:05 PM »
  Before TG and I got together, I told some guy I had just started dating that I loved him just to get in his pants. That one was not a qualifying ride, but luckily I had gone to his place (smart move) so I never had to see him again :P


 ???

never heard of a woman doing that, asking him to fuck you would have been just as effective i'm sure
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Offline mountainredneck2051

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #32 on: April 10, 2013, 10:54:49 PM »
O'hhh Crystal, what does your mom know  ;)

My number want need in a women is humor.
My number two need in a women is smarts.
My number three, four and maybe five is physical attributes.
My remaining needs are interest in my and her hobbies.

maybe shocking to some people but my list is

1. do i like you as a person
2. can we be friends and get along (friend zone is a bitch to play around with)
3. physical attraction
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Offline JohnyMac

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #33 on: April 10, 2013, 10:57:33 PM »
Right on Mntn!  [URL=http://www.smileyvault.co
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Alex1992

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #34 on: April 10, 2013, 11:17:47 PM »
Why thank you ThatGirl  [URL=http://www.smileyvault.co

Offline Ronin

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #35 on: April 11, 2013, 07:08:42 AM »
STS9

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #36 on: April 11, 2013, 07:43:16 AM »
Well done walker.


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Offline JohnyMac

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #37 on: April 11, 2013, 08:47:27 AM »
Sound TRIBE Sector 9. Don't know what the band has to do with Walkers great advise though. Was there a specific song you were thinking about Ronin?

Walker, you would make a good business man the way you attack a situation!

My wife and our story was more about her being an eclectic gal vs. the everyday normal suburban princess. She told me later that she thought me "a little out there too" which appealed to her.

Well the two of us have done many things together, that other married people would never do.

Like you and yours Walker, we moved apart in spirit for a couple of years in the early '00's but have grown closer together than ever post then. And yes it is easy to say, "I forgive you" however very difficult to really forgive.  [img]http://www.arrse.co.uk/at
   
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Offline thatGirl

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #38 on: April 11, 2013, 02:38:44 PM »

 ???

never heard of a woman doing that, asking him to fuck you would have been just as effective i'm sure

Trust me, I was shocked that I had to go to extremes to get some.  The dude had decided to only have physical relations with someone he loved, I think he was a reformed slut.  I've never been one to give up easily.  I said something like "I know it's really early in the relationship, but I think I'm falling in love with you", he teared up and said he felt the same way.  At that time I would suddenly switch from being attracted to someone, to being repulsed by them in the drop of a hat.  I probably would have talked to the guy a couple more times, but he completely flipped his shit on me right after the deed was done, so I left and ignored his phone calls for a month or two until he got the point.   

I wasn't always the nice person that I am now :))
All the great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope.
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Robert Frost

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Offline thatGirl

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #39 on: April 11, 2013, 02:57:36 PM »
The question we all have but I am old enough to ask is...Was the mohawk red? Earring in left or right ear?
For a while the mohawk was blue, then yellow (I liked the yellow more).  Most of the time he didn't bother to spike it, he'd leave it down and put a driver's cap on (mmm...).  No earing, although he did have a bridge (straight bar piercings through bridge of the nose ) at one point.

Maybe TG will share a picture with you all someday.  Every now and then he let's me shave a mohawk on him for old time sake :D 

All the great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope.
Winston Churchill

You have freedom when you're easy in your harness.
Robert Frost

Tomorrow hopes we have learned something from yesterday.
John Wayne

Offline thatGirl

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #40 on: April 11, 2013, 03:28:10 PM »
I must have forgotten to carry the 1 in my calculations or I'd have known the algorithm can go both ways (yes, I said it, laugh).

Nice! :))

Great story Tgirl. Thanks for the advice and the compliments! It took me awhile to realize that I could have a much for fulfilling young life if I put girls aside for awhile. Not to get too deep on this topic, but I think society puts WAY too much pressure on young people to "get with" someone. The pool is certainly overfished. Locale doesn't help much either. But it's cool, got to spend all that money on books and guns!

Society definitely puts a lot of pressure on folks.  Here in New Mexico, it's almost unheard of to be my age and not be married or divorced with a children.  Unfortunately I was boy crazy from an early age, but I always envied people that were more focused on their educations and hobbies.  My brothers ignored chicks until later in life and they took much faster, easier routes through college and grad school than I have because they were single.  I think you are being wise... 
All the great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope.
Winston Churchill

You have freedom when you're easy in your harness.
Robert Frost

Tomorrow hopes we have learned something from yesterday.
John Wayne

Offline thatGuy

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #41 on: April 11, 2013, 08:49:56 PM »
It was only blue once... once...

The sad truth is I don't have a single photo of myself as a teen.


backwoodsboy

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #43 on: April 13, 2013, 04:04:15 AM »
Lol i love the movie death wish...

But anyways, never been in a relationship but a girl i really use to like about a year ago, i found out the other day from her friend she liked me to  [img]http://www.arrse.co.uk/at but of course i wasnt sure at the time and now shes taken.  :'(
But most girls in general dont like me other than as a friend, all the ones that i can put up with think im odd, probably cause im 16 and they think its weird that all i do is hunt, fish, martial arts, and stay outdoors. most of them like yuppie boys.

Alex1992

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #44 on: April 13, 2013, 12:01:22 PM »
Yeah mountain I know the feeling about a few months there was this gorgeous girl I liked but she didn't like me that only as a friend , seems like I might be like this until I find somebody which could be a while and I'm no yuppie either.

Offline mountainredneck2051

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #45 on: April 15, 2013, 03:05:56 PM »
i think you mean bwb alex


yall just put off the wrong vibe and get friend zoned, when you meet a girl try to give off the i want you vibe and things will work out much better for ya
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Alex1992

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #46 on: April 15, 2013, 03:55:23 PM »
That's what I mean you like girl a lot only to find out you get stuck in the friend zone.

Offline Deathstyle

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #47 on: April 15, 2013, 04:17:58 PM »
How do you get out of the friend zone? I have a ladyfriend but havent made a move because Im broke. Like really really really broke. Hopefully thatll change soon but right now Im kinda in the area between the BFzone and the friendzone. As time goes by Im slowly slipping close into the orbit of the friendzone.

Im pretty sure if she spotted me with another chick she'd have a good cry so Im not in the friendzone just yet. [URL=http://www.smileyvault.co
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Offline mountainredneck2051

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #48 on: April 15, 2013, 09:05:51 PM »
make a fucking move on her= no more friend zone


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Offline thatGirl

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Re: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend?
« Reply #49 on: April 16, 2013, 02:59:11 PM »
I'm going to offer up advice based on how I roll, which may be completely off base for the chicks y'all are talking up.

Friend zone or not, if a chick has any interest in you, there's always an opportunity to relocate from the friend zone to a warmer region down south, but it all depends on timing.  If the chick you like is actually worth her salt as a friend, she will shy away from the idea of a romantic relationship with you, because she values the friendship too much to risk it.  With that said, the number one thing you shouldn't do, is tell her how you feel or talk about having a romantic relationship with her.  Asking results in a yes or no answer, and as long as she's clear headed and in control, she'll probably say no. 

If you've already breached this topic with her before, she either told you that she loves you as a friend but doesn't feel what you're feeling, or she really likes you but isn't willing to risk the friendship.  If she gave the first answer, be glad that you have her as a friend and start looking elsewhere for your future girlfirend/wife.  If she gave you the second answer, move on to the next steps...   

Here's what you do:

Even if you're in the friend zone, if the chick digs you, she probably makes it a point to hang out with you a lot.  When you are hanging out, start doing the things that make you good boyfriend material: tell her she looks smokin' hot, open doors for her (car door too), pay the check or cook her dinner to save non-existent money, pay attention to her instead of scoping out other bitches, listen to her and try be sensitive to whatever she's yammering about (work, school, guy she likes, etc...), watch a movie she wants to watch, I could go on and on.  With that said, don't turn into a total pushover... 

At some point there will come a time when, if you were on a date with someone, the moment feels right to make a move.  This is where I agree with Mountain, make a move! You want to catch her at a moment when she's wishing for prince charming to put his arm around her and start getting cozy.  I'm not sure about other chicks, but watching a movie on the couch is pretty much always a green light.  If she lives alone, stopping by later on a weekend night when she's in PJs, eating icecream and feeling lonely might be good timing too, depending on the girl.

The idea is, you need to build the sexual tension without scaring her off.  You also want to start a physical relationship by taking advantage of the primitive female desire to feel protected and make babies (without actually making babies ;)), in a way that seems spontaneous so she has no time to think about it and talk herself out of it.  Once all of that has happened, behave however you always have with her as a friend, but be a little nicer and show a little more interest in her so she knows that nothing has changed with your friendship and that you are stand-up dude, boyfriend material as well.

Good luck!!!   

All the great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, hope.
Winston Churchill

You have freedom when you're easy in your harness.
Robert Frost

Tomorrow hopes we have learned something from yesterday.
John Wayne